Being sick is lame. I’ve also decided that it’s also the most boring thing around. Is there anything more boring than being sick? When you just can’t do the things you want to do? Feeling out of it all the time? I’m convinced its more boring than almost anything else of considered – especially of the things that happen with some frequency. Hell, being sick doesn’t even give you the chance to really appreciate all the nice things people do for you when you are sick. Ugh…the worst.
So I’m feeling sick now for a couple of days. Pretty standard sick: A bit of congestion, a cranking sore throat and general body fatigue. It’s been going around here, so I think I just got caught in a weak immunity mode. Such is life.
That said, my recent illness had given me a good chance to familiarize myself with the techniques that the rest of the world uses to solve common colds. Why did I think that everyone would treat them the same?
Here are some things I have learned in the past two days:
Vitiman C is the cure-all for any problem you have related to your body.
Ironically, amazingly and without fail, other sick people will happily give you their advice on how both to prevent sickness and on how to get better.
Trust an old Indian Mom to give you the best advice – even if the advice mostly entails her consistently telling you to get some rest.
Vitamin C could cure malaria and an earache at the same time.
It is good to take as many vitamins as possible – regardless of whether or not they have any connection to your illness at all.
Don’t worry if the writing on the label is in Hindi (or any other language for that matter). The important thing is that you have faith in the interpreter.
Tea is only second to vitamin C as the greatest curing agent known to man. Drink tea, no matter the variety. Chai, green, Earl Grey, ginger honey…drink it and drink it a lot.
Vitamin C can cure your cough, ease your back pain, and negotiate successfully with Somali pirates all while developing a working economy in Zimbabwe.
Try ayurvedic medicine sometime. Even if you aren’t convinced it will work.
If you are from Fiji, you may find that your answer to any health problem is antibiotics. These are conveniently available in many locations in unmarked bottles without prescriptions.
Vitamin C, has just been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize.
Of all the medical advice I received, there is none better than the kind I’ve given myself. Don’t push it. Get some rest. Let others carry a little bit of your workload and just take it easy. With that in mind, I’m tucking in with a little National Geographic and saying goodnight. Feel better in the morning.
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8 comments:
ahh!! Chris! I very much enjoyed this posting. I've been trying to shake a cold for the better part of two weeks now, and I have to agree that people's remedies (world-round) can often-times seem kind of silly. I resorted to boiling water, ginger, garlic, lemon, and honey the other day, which actually helped things out a great deal, but within two hours I was back to square one.
Illness!! It's so dern persistent!
Yo yo I KNOW I've told you this before, Jaegar and Red Bull cures EVERYTHING, from sore throats to tuberculosis and everything in between. Fix yourself a Jaegar/Red Bull, exactly like a vodka/Red Bull, but with Jaegar instead of vodka. Take 3-5 of these, call me in the morning, you'll be completely cured. We discovered this miracle remedy back in college, it NEVER fails, no bacteria/virus/disease/foreign agent can sustain more than 2 JRBs, is Science. Seriously.
Feel better!! xoxo
You're not alone bro. I believe in Vitamin-C as well...
it is also true here in SA. corenza C is the solution to your cold and an opposition party to the ANC.
get better bru we must skype now now about india.
Dude,
Legend has it that Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer AND the common cold.
Too bad he's never cried.
That's an old one, but I still find it delicious and appropriate. Hope you feel better soon.
And Parker--your concoction sounds like a cross between a Golden Grahams commercial and the Macbeth witches' cauldron.
A) I wonder if parker was allowed to talk to anyone for two days after taking that down
B) Nic, it may be true, but its tough to track down a JRB in India
C) Jeff, can vitamin C repel mosquitos...?
D) Andrew, I think Vitamin C just finalized the Zimbabwe power sharing agreement, so help is on the way
E) Swansy, that one has always been my favorite. What I would do for a few of those tears.
Its like kryptonite to mosquitoes (jk).
sorry you aren't feeling well - really all you need is a mother's hug!!!!!!! Wish i could be there.
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